Christmas growing up was not as exciting as it is now. I have kids now and I truly enjoy seeing them on Christmas morning. Their little faces all puffy and swollen from sleeping, bad breath (really bad breath), mussed up hair-do's and the smiles, the smiles are worth a million. When I was a kid, Christmas was still very fun, very exciting and something that I waited anxiously for each and every year. It was different though. I didn't get as many things that my kids get. I never got that super great, unforgettable, unbelievable present. I got weird stuff. Sometimes I got good stuff like books that I wanted and one year I got a little portable stereo that I loved and had for like 10 years but usually I got socks or a sweater with a little bear wearing a hat or the occasional pack of pens and pencils. Here's the thing though, my mom was really poor. She did the best she could and my brother and I knew that. I might sound bitter but I don't mean to. She worked at minimum wage jobs and rode the city bus back and forth to get to them. She put stuff on layaway and couldn't afford to get it out when the time came (I probably have some cool stuff on layaway somewhere waiting to be paid for...). She wasn't very good at getting me the exact thing I asked for but she always got what she could afford or the next best thing.
Often times, (like every year), she would buy something mid-year and hide it. We didn't get these gifts until way after Christmas when she was cleaning out the closet or something and suddenly I would have a Christmas gift in April or May. This, honestly, was fun. Sometimes they were wrapped. This should've been a clue to what would later come... The weird re-gifting was later in the game.
I was in my teens when she started this and it was funny and sad at the same time. One year I got my old Cincinnati Reds t-shirt wrapped up in a gift box and everything. It was really small, at least 3 sizes too small, and it was a shirt that I had worn when I was in the third grade or so. I was re-given this shirt for Christmas when I was 15 years old. I looked at it and held it up and said "thank you". I looked at my step-dad and was thinking, "what the hell is wrong with you people? You can't put $10.oo in a friggin card or go to the store and get a pair of socks?" It was so strange, I thought it was a joke. It was not a joke. She looked so happy and excited to see my face when I opened my favorite shirt from third grade. I mean, I actually went to The Broadway and paid money for their gifts. And they give me my old t-shirt that was stained and streched out and could not possibly fit me. I knew my mom was crazy but this took the damn cake. She had to have found it in storage or the back of my closet or something and where was my step-dad when this was being done? Was he on the golf course and just handed her a couple of bucks and said "go for it, see what you can do with this?" What the hell?
It got better the next couple years and I ended up just asking for cash. This she did pretty good and I didn't ask for much, I quit asking for specific cassette tapes or albums. I got a job and bought my own stuff and even loaned her money for gifts so that my dad wouldn't get his old boxer shorts from his Air Force days. Then, after I had moved out, I came home for Christmas and there, in a box wrapped with bows and everything, was a unicorn mirror that I had won at the fair 3 years earlier. I had to say something. "Mom," I said, "I already have one of these. In fact this is the one I already have." She laughed, thank God, and said she wasn't sure if it was mine or not. "Wait, I have something else for you." I held my breath. "Here, we brought this back for you." Wrapped up in tissue paper was a can of LaRosa's pizza sauce from an Italian restaurant in Cincinnati. Now that was cool. You can't get LaRosa's sauce here in California and I lived on my own so food was something I could use and appreciate. She didn't need to wrap it but I think it might have been the best present ever.
As I write this, I remember a lot of crazy shit my mom did. We didn't realize at the time that she already had Alzheimer's and I guess if we had, life might have been different. I might have taken her shopping at Christmas and helped her pick out clothes from my closet to wrap that actually fit me. In any event, she was fun and now I have some great stories to tell. I'm sure that I will post some more funny stuff about my life with her as time goes on and as my memory allows. Hopefully my kids won't have as many weird stories to tell about me and hopefully I'll stop and remember before I re-gift something to them that they've already gotten.
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