Creative Re-gifting

Christmas growing up was not as exciting as it is now. I have kids now and I truly enjoy seeing them on Christmas morning. Their little faces all puffy and swollen from sleeping, bad breath (really bad breath), mussed up hair-do's and the smiles, the smiles are worth a million. When I was a kid, Christmas was still very fun, very exciting and something that I waited anxiously for each and every year. It was different though. I didn't get as many things that my kids get. I never got that super great, unforgettable, unbelievable present. I got weird stuff. Sometimes I got good stuff like books that I wanted and one year I got a little portable stereo that I loved and had for like 10 years but usually I got socks or a sweater with a little bear wearing a hat or the occasional pack of pens and pencils. Here's the thing though, my mom was really poor. She did the best she could and my brother and I knew that. I might sound bitter but I don't mean to. She worked at minimum wage jobs and rode the city bus back and forth to get to them. She put stuff on layaway and couldn't afford to get it out when the time came (I probably have some cool stuff on layaway somewhere waiting to be paid for...). She wasn't very good at getting me the exact thing I asked for but she always got what she could afford or the next best thing.
Often times, (like every year), she would buy something mid-year and hide it. We didn't get these gifts until way after Christmas when she was cleaning out the closet or something and suddenly I would have a Christmas gift in April or May. This, honestly, was fun. Sometimes they were wrapped. This should've been a clue to what would later come... The weird re-gifting was later in the game.
I was in my teens when she started this and it was funny and sad at the same time. One year I got my old Cincinnati Reds t-shirt wrapped up in a gift box and everything. It was really small, at least 3 sizes too small, and it was a shirt that I had worn when I was in the third grade or so. I was re-given this shirt for Christmas when I was 15 years old. I looked at it and held it up and said "thank you". I looked at my step-dad and was thinking, "what the hell is wrong with you people? You can't put $10.oo in a friggin card or go to the store and get a pair of socks?" It was so strange, I thought it was a joke. It was not a joke. She looked so happy and excited to see my face when I opened my favorite shirt from third grade. I mean, I actually went to The Broadway and paid money for their gifts. And they give me my old t-shirt that was stained and streched out and could not possibly fit me. I knew my mom was crazy but this took the damn cake. She had to have found it in storage or the back of my closet or something and where was my step-dad when this was being done? Was he on the golf course and just handed her a couple of bucks and said "go for it, see what you can do with this?" What the hell?
It got better the next couple years and I ended up just asking for cash. This she did pretty good and I didn't ask for much, I quit asking for specific cassette tapes or albums. I got a job and bought my own stuff and even loaned her money for gifts so that my dad wouldn't get his old boxer shorts from his Air Force days. Then, after I had moved out, I came home for Christmas and there, in a box wrapped with bows and everything, was a unicorn mirror that I had won at the fair 3 years earlier. I had to say something. "Mom," I said, "I already have one of these. In fact this is the one I already have." She laughed, thank God, and said she wasn't sure if it was mine or not. "Wait, I have something else for you." I held my breath. "Here, we brought this back for you." Wrapped up in tissue paper was a can of LaRosa's pizza sauce from an Italian restaurant in Cincinnati. Now that was cool. You can't get LaRosa's sauce here in California and I lived on my own so food was something I could use and appreciate. She didn't need to wrap it but I think it might have been the best present ever.
As I write this, I remember a lot of crazy shit my mom did. We didn't realize at the time that she already had Alzheimer's and I guess if we had, life might have been different. I might have taken her shopping at Christmas and helped her pick out clothes from my closet to wrap that actually fit me. In any event, she was fun and now I have some great stories to tell. I'm sure that I will post some more funny stuff about my life with her as time goes on and as my memory allows. Hopefully my kids won't have as many weird stories to tell about me and hopefully I'll stop and remember before I re-gift something to them that they've already gotten.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Hey everyone! Merry Christmas to all...
Well, Santa came to our house and he did a great job. Thank you Santa. We love you.
I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season. I am. I have a great story about my mother's famous re-gifting that I became accustomed to over the years but that will come later. Right now I have to clean up the crazy mess that goes along with ripping open gifts that took so long to wrap. Love tradition.

Oh-Bama!

What a dumbass! He really pissed me off this time. I have a friggen' Obama shirt for God's sake!
So... Rick Warren... hate-filled pastor. Super wrong and really bad. He does good things for Aids and Africa but he goes along with the hard core right wing Christians who think that gays and pedophiles and incestuous people are all filed in the same hell bound category. That is just so wrong. I get what Obama is trying to do. He's trying to show the other side that he's still a Christian and he wants the folks who didn't vote for him to say "oh look, he hates gays too.". Ok, that's not his point but what is? I mean this is like a "ha ha ha" to the gay people that were so excited to see him win. We all thought this would be a new era... we would have "change" and "hope". Now, I think we might be sad. Prop 8 passed... now this shit. Hell no! You are going to see gay people everywhere stand up and be heard. I'm not giving up on Obama, I still think he'll be a great President, I'm just disappointed and nervous. I know that this gay drama will be over soon and gay people will be allowed to get married and most people will come around. It just might be a while. And another thing... the people who keep saying we have the same "rights" are trippin'. When you get married, that's it, your married. To have the rights without getting legally married is not that easy, it's a lot of paperwork, lawyers, paying for court stuff and the "rights" can still be challenged. Marriage, under the law, requires much less and gives much more. It's easier, cheaper and much more binding. When children are involved, the only guarantee that you have is the actual legal contract of marriage. So... the crybabies that keep saying "you have the same rights... why are you so in need of our title... 'marriage'". Well, dumbass, because it's neat and clean and easy. We should get to have it neat and clean and easy like all of you. I'm a good parent and a good wife (although my "wife" might challenge that statement) and I see no reason for all of this protest. I get it though, opposers want to pretend gay people don't exist so they don't have to explain it to their children and they can't side with gay people because they might not get to Heaven. Hey, I understand, they are scared of that which they do not understand. That's why, right now, I'm scared shit less about the choice our new President has made as to who will stand with him on his Inauguration stage.

Waiting for Santa

two trees

Now we usually get a nice 4-5 ft tree and decorate and the kids get plenty of room for presents to be spread out etc... But this year we were on a budget so we got this little "Charlie Brown" tree. My kids were sad but finally came around. Then... one of my sweet little soccer players over heard me saying how we had to get a little tree and within a day, he bought us a huge 6 ft tree, bigger than any tree we've ever had in our house. It was crazy. He spent his own money and told his parents that he wanted to get us a tree because that's what Christmas is all about. What? Can you believe that? How sweet. I started crying, his mom started crying... it was awesome. This kid is 9 yrs old and he spent his own money that he does chores for to buy his (obviously favorite) soccer coach and family a tree. Wow!! That is what Christmas is all about. I'm so proud of that kid. I love Christmas and my family now has a gorgeous tree to light up our season.

size 10 1/2

Oh my goodness! Was that awesome or what? I thoroughly enjoyed watching that reporter from Baghdad throwing his shoe at ol' Bushie. It was glorious. I do appreciate what Bush's reaction was though, he said that the shoe throwing was an example of democracy. I get that a little bit. Maybe before we attacked their country and killed their mothers and children that reporter might not have been able to throw his shoe at our president. Then again, maybe he wouldn't feel the need to express his extreme anger through the most insulting way possible towards our president. It is sad to me that we went into that country to try and help them and ended up destroying more than we helped. The money for rebuilding Iraq? Where is that? How did that go to any good use? Haliburton? Hmmm... and who is responsible for this? We'll never get the straight answer. I'm sad for them and I'm embarrassed for us. Oil, oil, oil... gas prices went down, conveniently enough and hopefully they will stay low because I can't afford to go anywhere when they are high like they were. I wish I could know a little more about what happened in Iraq and I wish that more questions were asked and answered before we went in there. I think that the people of Iraq are worse off then they were before we went there. I would throw my shoe at Bush too if I were there. Who do we think we are, going into a country that didn't need our help. Iraq actually has more money in their country than we do. How does that make any sense? They need to loan us money for our bailout. And did that guy get his shoes back?

Tooth Fairy?

My sweet, innocent, wondrous little 10 yr. old daughter has just told me that she "knows" the tooth fairy is not real. Her friend heard on the news that a 15 yr. old (shockingly) still believed in the tooth fairy. What kind of fucking news shows is this child's mother allowing her to watch? I am appalled and saddened by this whole notion that my little girl is a non-believer. Has she lost her faith and hope in things that are fantasy and completely ridiculous? I'm not even mentioning Santa... don't go there. I should be relieved because I will save some money (she has several baby teeth still in that non-conforming head of hers) but I'm not. I can't lie to her but at the same time, I can't allow this in my home. Her brother still believes and oddly enough he hasn't lost nearly as many teeth as her. You'd think that, even knowing the truth, she would play along for a while just to get the payout... Oh my God... she's known for a lot longer than she's led on. That little tooth losing, under the pillow putting, "mommy did the tooth fairy come?" asking weasel. She's probably known for years. I can't even think about Santa and the Easter Bunny. What's next? Is she suddenly going to come home from school and tell us that her friend said she should be a Republican because shes afraid she'll turn into a "Socialist"? I'm not so sure about this friend... same friend whose dad said if gay people are allowed to get married then "hobos will want to marry trees"... that friend. My little girl is sweet and innocent and if hanging around this little hoodlum prevents her from enjoying her childhood, I will have to talk to her parents (I despise that father of hers... he's a whole posting of his own that I won't waste my typing skills on). I hope that she slows down on the questioning of imaginary people/animals that leave gifts for a bit because I don't know how much my heart can take at one time and I have a personal connection to the Clause's that I'm not willing to break off just yet.

Vacation

I'm on vacation and I do nothing. I have a chore list longer than I can explain but I have no desire to do anything. It's annoying. I wait around all day and get nothing accomplished. I haven't even written a bunch of stuff on this blog. I never go anywhere or do anything exciting. People always say, where are you going for your vacation? My response: The back yard to clean it up.
2 more days... what ever will I do... laundry and dishes. Whoo-hoo, I love vacation. The best part is having coffee and breakfast with my girl but beyond that... not so fun. Can't wait to go back to work. I really need a hobby.

A Day Without a Gay

I did not know about this day. I am a gay and I did not read this in my monthly gay newsletter. I am feeling out of touch and it's a good thing I'm on vacation because I don't think I would not show up to work. I'm not that into the whole "prove a point" thing when it comes to work and spending money. I won't be spending any money today because I have no money to spend and I don't think that has anything to do with being gay. Anyway, cheers to all the gays that didn't go to work today, I hope you don't get fired.

It's a sad day for the Hornets

Well, it's all over. We are not moving on the the quarter finals. We place 3rd in our pool. The team that won our pool had 25 pts., the second place team in our pool had 24 pts. and we had 23 pts. It was that close. We lost our last game and they played really, really good but we couldn't pull it off. My boys had a wonderful season and we are always going to be the 2008 U10 division champions for Ventura region 39 so I'm still a happy coach. We will have our last practice tomorrow where the boys will play this soccer game called "pac-man" that they have been asking me if they could play all season and I haven't let them because I don't know the rules but tomorrow, they can do whatever they want. Then on Sunday, we will have a pizza party and celebrate our excellent season. One family has offered to have a pool party in January (only in California can you have a pool party in January) for all of us.
I'm proud of the Green Hornets, I'm proud of my son and all his great plays (he headed the ball like 5 times this weekend and it was awesome), and I'm proud of myself for not crying just now when I found out we are out of the next set of games. What a run we had! Now I wait until spring soccer which I will coach again without all the pressure of playoffs and points and placement. Spring is just for fun. All of this is just for fun and we all had a lot of fun!
Thanks for reading and praying and crossing your fingers. It helped.

Hornets do it again!

Oh my goodness people. We are on mother lovin' fire!! We did it again. 1st game... outstanding. 4-0 our favor, total sweep... we earned 10 points (maximum allowed) towards the seeding. It works like this: 6 pts for the win, 1 more pt for a "shut-out" (that's when they don't score at all), 1 additional point for each goal scored over them up to 3 goals. So with a 4-0 win, we earned 10 pts! The hard part about all this is that once we are up by 4, they want us to slow down and not score anymore. It's to prevent teams from running up the score and it's good sportsmanship but when your boys are playing well it's really difficult to tell them not to score. Especially when it's a chance for a player who hasn't scored yet to get a goal for the 1st time. Anyway, we won the 1st game easily and it was beautiful.
Second game, a little different. We won but it kinda was wierd and almost a loss. We played Fillmore's #3 team and they were way better than I had been told (don't trust the Santa Barbara asst. coach for future reference...). These guys were fast and scored on us right away. They got a lot of fouls and played really rough. One of their players got a kick to the face (accidently) and their coach had a fit because the Ref didn't see it. Well he yelled at the Ref really badly and pissed him off. Nice, thanks a lot dude. Not a way to coach, it never works out well when you do that. So, what ended up happening is we were tied at half time. Then we scored in the 3rd quarter. I had pulled one of my #1 players and my son for the 3rd quarter with plans to put them back in for the 4th and have them rally for another goal or 2. Not so lucky, the Ref was so distracted from the Fillmore coach yelling at him that he forgot to call in the fourth quarter subs so we played the whole second half with the same players and no subs. Didn't bother me, we won but Fillmore "yells-a-lot" was sooo mad. The poor little Ref. He's all "Ref error, sorry, call stands" (that means we won no matter what). Holy moly, that was a lucky break and a happy moment. I mean I think we still would have won but maybe he pulled his best guy 3rd quarter too and that's why he was so mad. Anyway, we are doing well and I am happy to it. We earned 7 points for the second game and now everything rides on tomorrow. A 3-0 win would seal the deal and put us in the quarter finals next weekend then to win that and the semi's and... dare I say it... The Finals... then we would be Area W champs... that's huge. We need to play smart and think positive. These kids from these other cities, they are good. We need to be better. I can't wait for tomorrow. Say your prayers and cross your fingers. We need this win!
Thanks for reading, I will post the results tomorrow.

league playoffs begin tomorrow

well, my championship team moves on to league playoffs tomorrow. we play 3 games, 2 saturday, 1 sunday. hope we do well. i'll let you know tomorrow. i have to wake lukas up at 6 am. hope he's ready. lily has to get up shortly after that, poor thing, she is not a morning person. me either.
big day.
go hornets!!