Catching up on soccer and the Koran

ok so i'm friggin' sorry. it's soccer season and i haven't been blogging. Hell, I haven't even been on twitter very much. I'm a busy bitch. here's a couple things though: the douche bag that wants to burn the Koran or Quran (however the hell we spell it now...) is a fucking idiot. He has the right to do this unspeakable deed but he's a total dick for doing it. My next door neighbors are total and complete assholes and from now on when they say something shitty or give me a dirty look I'm just going to say "you know what? Fuck you... I'm a nice God damn person and your a total dick" (I will say this to the Dad, Mom or the two bitchy, weird 11 yr. old twins). Fuckin had it with those people. I've tried, really have, they just are hateful and miserable...

My soccer team is awesome. We are really good so far, I hope that we can maintain the momentum and beat some teams down this season. We are the Hammerheads and despite the stupid name, my boys got some mad skills. First game 4-3, second game 5-0 and we play this Saturday. My assistant coach is really good and doesn't just show up whenever and wear flip-flops or lay on the grass. He actually helps. You all should come watch one game... even for like 5 minutes... I really get into it. I jump up and down, run up and down the field, sometimes I roll around, I've gotten hit (really fuckin' hard) in the head and side of my face and twice I was walking backwards, tripped over a ball and fell down... TWICE! I love it. Games are like my freakin' drug. I live for them. I get really nervous and excited just before, I say inappropriate things to the parents because I kinda lose my mind for a few minutes. It's a blast. I don't even play... I just tell them what to do and half the time I'm shouting out random shit that I don't even know if it makes sense or not. Whatever, I always win. Not like every game but I feel like my players learn something from me. If anything, they know I care. I was the mother loving coach of the 2008 U10 AYSO Ventura Championship team for Gods sake! Don't trip, I know my shit bitches!

My car was left unlocked and some fuck-stick broke into everybody's car last Sunday and got away with 2 of my iPods and 2 brand new packs of smokes. I was bummed. This happen last year and I've been keeping the car locked but I forgot to check that night and sure enough... 1st time they only got cigarettes but this time the iPods.

My employees chipped in and bought me a nice new one that's better than the 1st so that was pretty cool. I cried when they gave it to me. How thoughtful they are. Don't even think of stealing it out of my car, it ain't gonna be in there fuckers!

I'm turning 40 in a few weeks and I'm kinda shitting bricks a little bit. I really need to quit smoking and go to like the doctor or whatever but... let's just see how those genetic test results come out before I make any rash decisions right? Yeah, that sounds good.

Well, that's it, nothing too exciting. Patriot day is coming up. I'll be in my back yard burning the Koran and just for good measure I'll throw in a Bible or two. What the hell.