Ok fine, I stalked my ex-boyfriend.

So... check this out, I just got an e-mail asking if I was the same Angie that dated a guy named Jeff in high school. Ok, yes, I dated a guy named Jeff in high school... but... do I know who this person is asking me? No, I do not so I reply "whose this?". He replies: "Jeff". Oh, ok then. Uh...what do I say? I haven't talked to this guy since I drove by his house 4 years after we broke up in 1986 and I am a little nervous. Does he know I'm gay? Does he think it's his fault? Oh God, I should tell him it's his fault... should I? No, that's mean. I did love him. He was my first real, not just holding hands and passing notes but actually going places and dances and buying nice gifts and talking about marriage and writing poetry and spending the entire summer riding on the back of his moped and going to band practice and eating dinner at his house with his parents kind of relationship. He was my first break-up (I was on the receiving end which is why I think blaming my homo-ness on him would be great payback) and it took me a really long time to get over it. We dated for about 6 months but it seemed like a lot longer because for two years I was still reading old letters and reminiscing and being sad. I sorta stalked him for a little bit. Drove past his house (as mentioned), walked behind him at school then hid behind trees if he looked around... stuff like that. My mom talked about him ALL the time to me (especially when she found out I was gay) and tried to invite him over for dinner without informing me. It was like a real high school romance then we broke up. He got really into his punk rock music and acted all macho man and since I've always been really macho, I think my awesomeness was too much. He probably needed one of those little punker following chicks that just waits around for their big tough guy to start a fight at the yogurt place or kick somebodies ass for being mexican or some shit. Whatever, I'm not bitter. My point is...how strange to hear from someone after so long. How weird is it that I had a boyfriend that I was totally in to (he wasn't my only boyfriend that I loved either...is that weird too?)? Does this have anything to do with me being gay? I really don't think so... I'm a person that likes actual people for who they are and maybe I'm just slutty and that's why I've loved both men and women. No, because I know slutty people who don't like both men and women. I'm definitely not "bi-sexual"... is that even a real thing? I really don't know and this probably isn't the forum for me to discuss my sexuality but I just thought it was so odd to hear from this guy after 20 some odd years... and then to explain that I'm now gay with a girlfriend and kids was a little odd too. I replied to him and we chatted a bit, he wasn't weirded out that I'm a homo and he seems to be doing well. It was strange though and a little nerve racking but ("there's always a big butt") I'm proud of who I am and who I was when I was in high school. I'm not ashamed of anything or embarrassed by that much either. I had a boyfriend and then a few more... I had a shitload of relationships both good and bad and each one has brought me closer to the one I have now and it's pretty damn good. I don't foresee much stalking going on in the near future and I don't plan on getting an e-mail asking if I ever dated a girl named Amy.